Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Ever wondered...what exactly your pooch is trying to tell you? when they whine, they bark, they growl etc etc? Despite the Japanese's weak attempt at coming out with that nonsensical doggie dictionary device that is supposed to tell you your dog's emotion, it seems that no one has of yet really come out with a fool-proof contraption for doing so.

As I was jogging today, a dog in a house on my left barked at me, and quite loudly I might add. Across the street, diagonally to my right, another dog started barking. Afterwards I could hear them still barking even though I was a distance away. It occured to me that the exchange could very well have been this:-

Left dog: Hey, you smell bad. Go away!

Right dog: Who the hell are you calling smelly? You don't smell so hot yourself either!

Left dog: I wasn't talking to you, you nosey bitch! (could have been one) I'm talking to this guy running suspiciously by my territory . He looks very sneaky. It's none of your business anyway.

Right dog (mildy embarassed): Oh, oh yeah? This is my street as much as it is yours. Who the hell are you to tell me to shut up!

Left dog: Now you're trying to pick a fight aren't ya. Well bring it on. Come on. Come on over and I'll show you who's top dog!

Right dog: You come over!

Left dog: You come over...

...

That actually ties in with the fact that they're barking their brains out after I'm long gone. I'm more talented at lies than the Japanese...